3 Actions Parents Can Take to Teach Their Kids About Racial Injustice and Black Lives Matter
I understand that I will never understand. But, I will stand.
I recently delivered a graduation address to my formidable Class of 2020. And in it, I talked about my school community, comparing it to Wonderland—“a place filled with a beautifully diverse and unique cast of characters.” I wrote this speech in the weeks prior to the killing of George Floyd. I wrote it long before the palpitating civil unrest we currently face could ever have been in my mind’s eye.
The truth is—I have been left without words since Monday, May 25, 2020. I have been overwhelmed by the same shock, disbelief, anger, grief, and devastation that is shared across our nation. And, as a school leader, I have wanted to say something. So many things. Because I need my students to know that I see them—I see their intellect, their courage, their integrity, their tenacity. I celebrate their creativity and charisma. I delight in their wit, value their opinions, and embrace their perspectives. I champion the hopes and dreams and aspirations that they each have for their futures.
But, I also recognize fully that I am a white woman at the helm of a school community that is, as I noted, beautifully diverse: 42% Latino, 22% African-American, 18% Filipino-American, and 16% multi-ethnic. I love each of these children with a fervor I can only imagine to be fractionally akin to the adoration of their parents/guardians. There is nothing that I wouldn’t do to protect them; I want them to have the world.
But, when I saw the following image on social media, my heart stopped:
And, I say this with no exaggeration, for I was truly stunned. I can empathize with my students’ struggles; I can condemn the racially charged epithets of small-minded bullies; I can cry with my community over the devastating truth that our nation is so fractured, so archaic in its cultural unification. But, I can never understand the fear and marginalization that crowds their realities, simply because of the skin color into which they were born.
And, I don’t want to be just another white person chiming in with sympathies.
I need to continue being an ally.
I need to use my privilege and power to ensure that these kids have every opportunity available to them.
We all do.
So, where do we start?
Here are a few ways that I would recommend addressing the death of George Floyd and championing the Black Lives Matter movement with your kids.
Talk to Your Kids!
Lead With Vulnerability
A friend and I were discussing how to broach the subject with her 11 year-old niece. Maybe you are wondering the same thing with your own children. There is no doubt that they are being bombarded by images of social unrest, destruction, and the video itself of George Floyd dying. Talk to them about what they are seeing and how it makes them feel. Start the conversation by establishing a safe space for vulnerability by leading with your own feelings.
“I am so upset about what happened in Minneapolis. How are you feeling about it?”
“I’m seeing a lot of startling images on Instagram. What are your friends posting about George Floyd’s death?”
“How can we, as a family, take a stand and be an ally to our friends and neighbors of color?”
Reinforce Your Words With Actions
Be open to how they respond to the latter question. Do they want to march? Do they want to donate money to the ACLU or the NAACP? Do they know about those organizations or others that promote equality? Take time, as a family, to survey these. And, keep the dialogue alive, far beyond the immediate unrest has quelled-- long-lasting change comes only when we actively and consistently seek to instill it.
Address Your Civic Responsibilities
Talk to your children about the November election. Barack Obama said it best: “We have to mobilize to raise awareness, and we have to organize and cast our ballots to make sure that we elect candidates who will act on reform.” Our children need to know that their voices matter. They need to know that the ballots they themselves will one day cast are catalysts for change in this nation. They need to see you put your heartache and frustration into action by going to the polls this Fall. Take them with you when you vote or fill out your absentee ballot with them so that they understand the collective power that comes from citizens making informed choices. And, before that day arrives, research with them the measures proposed for your city; discuss the backgrounds and positions and parties of those seeking elected office.
Use the Summer Months for Exploration
Summer Reading To Embrace Diversity & Understand Equality
Yes, your child will have homework over the summer, and it is likely going to include a reading log of some kind. Explore book titles that will broaden their global perspective, enhance their understanding of the evolution of the fight for civil rights in this country, and bolster their knowledge about those who have pioneered a path towards equality. Here’s a great list of 31 books to get you started. Oh, and don’t be afraid to use children’s books with your older students, too. These can still be wildly beneficial to building within them a deep appreciation regarding the struggle for equality that has plagued our nation.
Dig Into the History
Even though your capacity to travel may be limited this summer due to the ongoing shelter-in-place restrictions, you can still take a virtual tour of the historic sites significant to the Civil Rights Movement. Utilize summer evenings for family movie nights, using these films as a great means of continuing the conversation around race relations and the fight for freedom so many people of color have endured.
Evaluate Your Toy Box
Take an inventory, with your children, of their toy box. Does it adequately represent the spectrum of skin colors, genders, and body types that will create a foundation for your child to recognize and celebrate all humans, no matter their appearance? If not, check out Colours of Us for some awesome ideas.
As I continue to struggle in finding the right words to say, I cling to the narratives of those who have gone before me.
I recently sent out an excerpt of Maya Angelou’s Still I Rise to my school community as a meditation on peace and perseverance, and I would encourage you to use this as a cornerstone in your household, too.
Because, now is the time for action.
Now is the time to persevere for those whose voices have been muffled by iniquity.
Now is the time for us, together, to rise.
You may write me down in history
With your bitter, twisted lies,
You may trod me in the very dirt
But still, like dust, I’ll rise.Just like moons and like suns,
With the certainty of tides,
Just like hopes springing high,
Still I’ll rise.Did you want to see me broken?
Bowed head and lowered eyes?
Shoulders falling down like teardrops,
Weakened by my soulful cries?You may shoot me with your words,
You may cut me with your eyes,
You may kill me with your hatefulness,
But still, like air, I’ll rise.
Out of the huts of history’s shame
I rise
Up from a past that’s rooted in pain
I rise
I’m a black ocean, leaping and wide,
Welling and swelling I bear in the tide.
Leaving behind nights of terror and fear
I rise
Into a daybreak that’s wondrously clear
I rise
Bringing the gifts that my ancestors gave,
I am the dream and the hope of the slave.
I rise
I rise
I rise.
- Maya Angelou, Still I Rise
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